Conflict Resolution

So just to make sure that the working relationship between myself and my esteemed colleague Dylf was smooth as ever, all the talent here on the site got together to address the issue, just to make sure there were no problems.

We are super professional like that.


*Begin Flashback *

All right, so obviously B.@.D and Dylf have been having some problems on the site. For the good of the team, we all agreed it'd be good if we got together and resolved...

... problems??? What the fuck is this??? I didn't agree to this. B.@.D said it was all in good fun. Ozi, you told me we we're all going out to karaoke!

I knew you wouldn't come if I told you the truth.

Dylf, I'm gonna kick your fucking ass! I want you off the fucking site, you prick!

Dude, I wasn't serious. I just thought it'd be funny to...

No, don't just be sorry. THINK for one fucking second! What the FUCK are you DOING!?! Are you professional or not?

Yes I am.

Do I walk around and...

B.@.D...

No!!! Shut the fuck up, Miz. Do I walk around and insult Dylf for no reason, in the middle of a post?

Yes, actually.

Yeah, actually man... you STARTED the...

SHUT THE FUCK UP, B-RUSH, OR I'LL FIRE YOU AGAIN SO FAST YOUR HEAD'LL SPIN!!!

You really should try to calm...

So then why the fuck is Dylf, in the middle of his posts, going aaah, duh duh, duh duh... insulting me in his fucking posts!? What the fuck is it with you?!? WHAT DON'T YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND!?! You got any fucking idea about, "Oh hey, it's fucking hurtful, Dylf bitching out B.@.D, in the middle of the fucking post!" GIVE ME A FUCKING ANSWER! What don't you get about it?

Relax, I'm sure we can...

No! No! You know what? Fuck that! I can talk for myself!

Um... where is the Prince?

Hey, yeah...

... and it's not just today. We haven't seen The Prince in...

NO... NOOOO! Don't you shut me up. He had his turn. Now it's my turn.

We're not shutting you up.

When you we're in Punta Cana the comments we're down. You blamed me even though I tried to fix it!

OHHHHHHH!!! GOOOOOD FOR YOUUUUU!!! And how was it? I hope it was fucking good because it's useless now, isn't it?

That doesn't make any sense...

*chuckle*

* The Prince enters the building. *

Hey guys, sorry I'm late.

Who are you?

Uh... it's me. The Prince.

Who the fuck is "The Prince"?

I'm The Prince!

No, I know that. But I mean like...who is "The Prince"?

I'm The Prin...

I know, I know. I'm sorry. I... I just don't remember... you know what? It's not important. I guess I'm just distracted with this whole Dylf thing. What can we do for you?

You told me... to come... because of some... conflict... or something... that you're having... with... Dylf I guess..?

...

I don't know. I don't read the site.




...



...




GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!

* The Prince exits the building. *

At least he's all right.

I'm not allright!!! What the fuck was that all about?!? We gotta get some security up in this bitch!

B.@.D, that was The Prince. He's a friend of yours. You brought him on boar...

SHUT THE FUCK UP, B-RUSH!!! And Dylf, you're goddamn amateur. Mizzle, you got fucking something to say to this prick?

I wasn't around when it happened...

B.@.D, this is between you and Dylf. Let's not bring Mizzle...

EXACTLY, Mizzle's right. SOMEONE should be fucking watching Dylf, and keeping an eye on Dylf. Prick is outta control. On the fucking sidebar with his stripper picture, writing about getting hard while drowning, and I'm sitting over here with my dick in my hand writing articles while he insults me!

That's not what Mizzle said...

Get it? I'm trying to fucking write some articles here, and I'm going "Why the fuck is Dylf insulting me for no reason?" Do you understand my fucking FEELINGS ARE HURT if he's doing that?

Dylf, maybe it'd just be easier if you apologize. He's really upset.

Oh for fuck's... fine. I absolutely apologize. I'm sorry.

Stay off the fucking site man. For fuck's sake. You're unbelieveable man. You're un-fucking-believeable. The number of times he's fucking insulted me. Aaah... you know what? You don't fucking understand what it's like working with real writers. That's what that is.

No, that's not what it is.

THAT'S WHAT THAT IS, MAN! I'm telling you. I'm not ASKING... I'm telling you. That wouldn't have happened otherwise.

No... you started it... I was just responding to...

I'm gonna fucking kick your FUCKING ASS if you don't shut up for a second, alright!?!?

Okay, man. Okay. We get it.

Yeah, YOU might get it. THEY might get it. HE doesn't fucking get it. You might! HE! DOES! NOT! GET IT!

It's okay. We'll make adjustments. I get it.

Seriously Dylf, you and me, we're fucking done professionally. Fuckin' ass.

* End Flashback *


See? It's all good.

But yeah, fuck Dylf. I hope he comes out of the closet soon.

B.@.D

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

this is... the greatest thing ever.

bravo sir.

Anonymous said...

a-greed!
GP

Anonymous said...

GP!!!!

Anonymous said...

Its Prince...but I can't login cause I don't know the password anymore...or I've been put on Injured reserve waiting for my call back...

B@d...I can't read this crap with the globe in the background...and the back and forth with all the colors is giving me nausea...

It's a cute little site you have running here.

Anonymous said...

I would send you your login, Prince, but we both know you won't remember it until you decide to write while wasted one night, a la Dylf.

Of course, knowing your luck, you'll be able remember it ONLY when wasted, right before you find a package of unopened jellybeans under the desk just before you pass out.

Anonymous said...

GP!!!! price you should write again.

Anonymous said...

Prince = the new Katastrophe

Anonymous said...

maybe he's not into writing because people keep calling him "price"?

Anonymous said...

i loved the Prince stuff... awkward silence... GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!!

Anonymous said...

lol - gp my man.

Anonymous said...

gp!!!!

Ozi-Style said...

Mmmmm teamwork, is there anything better?

Dylf said...

......teamwork is best when it involves a hi-five over the back of some random......

Anonymous said...

i just want to say, i think this was the best ever.
Prince, you sir are fucking funny and fit right in. I wish you'd write more too.

Anonymous said...

GP!!!!

Anonymous said...

i agree - best ever. do more of these.

Anonymous said...

GP bad!

Anonymous said...

Prince - how does the globe in the background make you sick? It's not like it's in front of the writing.

GP bad

Anonymous said...

PRINCE CAMEO!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

gp!!!!

Dylf said...

B.@.D. your comment is awesome.....either you are so proud of your post you decided to compliment yourself or else you were trying to pad your comment stats and anonymously take a stab at the prince but forgot you were logged into your blogger account and posted it as yourself, unbeknownst to you.......bravo......

Ozi-Style said...

Oh snap Dylf!

Anonymous said...

Actually, I legitimately thought I would join in the congratulations to myself on a fine fucking post, hoping that I could draw a laugh. Unfortunately, I don't think anyone even noticed until you. I even mis-pronounced my name, as I'm pretty sure you and I are the only ones who ever punctuate it correctly.

Patting myself on the back... now where could I have picked *THAT* shit up from...?

Just kidding. Kisses all around. And a high five across the back of a random...